Comfort Zone

I was born and grew up in the city. I am used to simply going out of our house and finding all that we need by just a walk away, our friends and relatives are all just literally a call away. So I can not imagine myself living in a place far, far away from everything especially away from all the significant friends. I’ll honestly freak out unless I've got all the necessities I need around me within reach.  But the reality for the past years is that I all my family members and old friends are far away already since we stayed overseas. We meet new friends but the distance between is a sad fact that remains. My husband, kids and I, most of the time, feel alone. Under this situation, we have always chosen to stay in the city and make the most of what is around us.

As of writing this article, we are in the situation of moving to a place far, far away from the city (OK, allow me just to exaggerate a bit, he. he.). It's about 45 minutes in a private car depending on the traffic flow. In contrast though, it is just a 25-minute drive away from Rowin’s company. I should be having a heavy heart regarding this un-welcomed change, making a long argument and becoming a selfish stubborn person that I can be to not to allow this to happen. A part of me is protesting why do I have to give up everything and be a "captive" of my own family when all I need to do is work my way up my professional ladder again. I must admit that I had high expectations when I was still studying, dreaming to drive my own two-door top down white car, to have my own big dream house (but I surmised that this is just a fad that can easily fade away) and traveling around the world enjoying every beauty of God’s creation. On the other hand, I unceasingly pray to God for a happy, peaceful and loving family too (this needs a continuance of good relationship and ,with lots of prayers, will give a lifetime of personal achievement). 

Amazingly, my husband did not even sweat out when he asked me to relocate again to this far-flung place for I did not want to waste my energy disagreeing or giving him a heartache knowing it was his foremost decision to move there. I prefer for us to be in good spirit as much as possible to wherever destinations or whatever situations we may be. Our relationship is more important than anything else and so I agree instantly though I still have some hesitations. It all ends up to having more quality time that could be spend into more productive and valued moments together especially with the home-schooling of  Zek. This would also imply less exposure to crowded areas thereby avoiding most of the common possible acquired  illnesses for Aim. Meanwhile, me and Rowin could catch a breeze of fresh air and spend more time to refill our diminishing love tanks.

I prayed to God that He disciplined me from all my selfish ambitions us as we follow His path. If it’s my way that is not according to His will, then may He transform my heart towards the right direction for there is no easy way to a good life, prioritizing the importance of values and not our valuables.

Lots of things needed to be considered, like basic necessities, schools and after home-school activities for Zek, supermarkets or markets nearby, reliable hospital (our top priority for my allergic, asthmatic, prone to sickness boys) but unfortunately, the nearest one is about 15 minutes travel time by car. Thinking all of these stuffs reinforces my worries and these concerns me a lot. I do realize that this shows me how little faith I have in our God. I feel shamed by these moments that I need to undergo every time we face changes away from our comfort zone when our regular daily life gets disturbed.

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothes? Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” - Matthew 6:25-34

Truly, it all goes without saying that to depend on God’s unconditional love to us is always the primary option and the rest will follow as we humble ourselves before Him. 

As Rowin is leading our family, I will be ever supportive of his headship as I can be and we will be praying together that may the Lord strengthen us, lead us and show us His wisdom that we may gain knowledge from it according to His will. Yes, not our will be done. 

"My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,' says the Lord. 'For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

"...be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for 'God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.' Therefore, humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. Be sober; be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour." 1 Peter 5:5-8